Taoism: Shit Happens

Hinduism: This Shit Happened Before

Islam: If Shit Happens, Take A Hostage

Buddhism: When Shit Happens Is It Really Shit?

7th Day Adventist: Shit Happens On Saturdays

Protestantism: Shit Won`t Happen If I Work Harder

Catholicism: If Shit Happens, I Deserve It

Jehovah`s Witness: *Knock* *Knock* "Shit Happens"

Judaism: Why Does Shit Always Happen To Me?

Hare Krishna: Shit Happens Rama Rama Ding Dong

Atheism: No Shit

T.V. Evangelism: Send More Shit

Rastafarianism: Let`s Smoke This Shit