My little Pony; Friendship is Magic 2.0

I was once on the deep web and saw a can of Mountain Dew for 20 bucks. I told the person selling it that it was a rip off and that nobody would buy it. He then agreed to sell it to me for 5 bucks. I couldn't turn down a deal like that so we decided to meet at Walmart because I was too lazy to drive to Burger King. When I arrived, I saw that the seller was an Asian with a white van so I drove off. Though before I left the parking lot, Shrek hijacked my car and killed me. I'm currently alive typing this because I used hax to bring myself back to life.